Hello,

My wife and I have been married for about 6 years now, two children, and getting started on our divorce. Yay us.

How long does a divorce typically take?
(I’m looking for past experience, not your guess, or what you have heard).

I'm willing to give her whatever she needs to support the kids and her, in hopes it will be less painful. She’s being very vindictive, and petty at the moment, could this delay the process? If so, how?


What sort of benefits does she still keep if any? Alimony? Spouse support? Any advice you can provide will help. Thanks in advance. 

Sorry for your predicament. The divorce process, legally speaking, depends on the state where the divorce is being filed through. For example, California it takes 6 months roughly. for the whole process to be official. Also, I'm assuming you filed first since she is being vindictive. If you filed a divorce she has a certain time period to respond to the divorce if not, then the judge will sign for her pretty much. She maintains spouse support for about 6 months (Or whatever time the Judge sees fit) then after that shouldn't be anything but the child support. Anyways, go to base legal they will go more into detail. 

My mom just finalized her divorce last month after more than 3 years. The other party became quite petty and drug out the process. My mom gets spousal support, child support (I have a sister 24 years younger than me) and part of his retirement. If she were to marry again she would lose the spousal support and retirement. The courts actually upped the amount of child support over what the two of them had mutually agreed upon when they split, my mom did not ask for that they just have certain formulas I guess. 

File for legal separation first thing so any debt incurred while the divorce is processing is on the individual.

6 year marriage you are probably looking at 3 years of alimony (you can negotiate that). 2 kids...child support is based on your pay verse hers the number isn't negotiable it is what it is. She's entitled to a % of your retirement should you stay in (another thing you can negotiate).

If she's being petty you might have to take it to lawyers, base legal only helps with non-disputed divorces the second you don't mutually agree they drop you.

It can take 6 months if everything goes perfectly or years if it doesn't... it all depends on how quickly you both can agree on terms. Figure once you have both signed the PSA...about 2 months before you get it back signed by the court. 

Donny, I think she can only get part of the retirement after they have been married a certain number of years WHILE he is in the Military. With my ex, it was being married 10 years while he was in.
Alimony is not always given either, especially if the wife worked.
Then too it depends on the judge. He/she can decide on more/less then agreed upon. 

the whole retirement/10yr thing is a myth...no matter how long you are married the spouse rates a certain percentage of your retirement.whether or not the spouse gets it is up to him/her and/or the judge if it goes to court. at 10 yrs a check is automatically cut to the spousee and under 10 yrs you must cut the check...
alimony, if it goes to court, is typically given for half the length of marriage, but it also depends on if she worked, is working now, how much she makes, ect...same goes with child support...theres a calculation for how many kids and how much you (and she) make...if she's not working and refuses to get a job, you can have it court oredered that she finds a job and be given proof that shes looking (given a certain number of job contacts a week)...your best bet is to go to an attorney's office and get a free consult. every case is different. good luck!