I sent my ex a photo of our son to keep him updated.

In that photo comes a reply of him asking me for dating advice and asking if he was a pain to deal with.
(We do not have a friendly relationship.. More nemesis, so I was taken aback by being asked).

I was greatly peeved but answered anyway in an annoyed but yet helpful manner.

This guy is always concentrated on women rather than his child. He's that type of skeeze. He only pulls out the child card to his family/friends to get sympathy, but when he is actually present for months on end he rarely makes an effort to see him.

Yes he is a marine.

It just peeves me that he lacks effort into even asking what our kid is doing and or what he likes/is into, (doesn't even care to ask how he's doing in school) etc. Yet he asks about dating advice. WTF. Oy. Am I overreacting? 

Who cares what his career is? If he was a janitor would you have said that? Are we supposed to be *shocked* that a Marine doesn't want to hear about his kid or *figures a Marine wouldn't want to see his kid*? However, realize hm being a Marine he has job commitments and won't always be stationed near your house. Pretty sure I wouldnt pay for my baby mama, her husband, and the kid to have family fun time in another state just to see a kid once.

If he's not going to be a constant in the kid's life then why start?

A lot of people on here have a lot of drama (real and imagined lol) with their baby daddy. 

My ex and i are on good terms, but a definitive line is drawn in the sand.

We don't talk unless it has to do with the kids. No "Hi's, How are you's, can you help me's...etc". We talk almost daily, but it's always about the kids and then the conversation ends.

An ex is an ex for a reason, no good can usually come from idle chit chat. 

These threads seem to come up more and more lately. What's with peoples anger towards their ex's and/or family members? Stress and resentment are not good things to have. 

OP, I wouldnt have even responded. He's probably using it to rub in your face that you cant have him anymore. *gag*
That was my first thought anyway. 

JUST SAYIN

I was speaking in regards to him being away for so long and returning and using it for gain with his family and friends as a reason he stays away from our kid.

Hence when he's away for so long due to deployments... He uses it as an excuse. Hence why I mentioned.

You are right Donny, no good comes from Idle chit chat. That obviously came out of left field from him for a reason.

I'm married, I could care less what he does with his life, but what disturbed me was the way he came about it. From now on I'm just going to keep my distance and like others have suggested... Just wait until he tries for his son and let his true colors be shown.

There is no disdain on my part, I hold no grudge, I just want him to get his head out of the gutter or GTFO and give me SOLE custody if this continues. 

I was speaking in regards to him being away for so long and returning and using it for gain with his family and friends as a reason he stays away from our kid.

Are you collecting child support? If so you're using your kid for cash if you keep collecting every month. He still has his parental rights therefore he's still entitled to "claim" that child as his for whatever personal (seeing as you're using the kid for financial gain) "gain" you think he is. 

Baby mamas whine all the time about having to share their kid , but I don't see any of them ending the father's rights in situations such as this, why? Bc they want to keep the money coming in (financial gain). Ps. It's BOTH parents obligation to support their kid with their resources (her new income and new home is only bc of her new spouse). It's not solely the responsibility of the MAN. She's still accepting the chck monthly so she is making a financial gain, regardless of what closed-minded view you want to see it from.

ETA: it takes 2 people to make a kid then why does only ONE person have to be responsible for it? Looks like a 50/50 venture to me, but she's the one collecting. 

So much baby drama lately...I feel like these posts are made daily right now.

If my ex asked me for dating advice or how he was...I'd respond with..."we got divorced for a reason..." and let him take it as he wants to. It probably wouldn't irritate me because your divorced, he's going to date, you can chose to ignore him, just like he does your son. 

ETA: it takes 2 people to make a kid then why does only ONE person have to be responsible for it? Looks like a 50/50 venture to me, but she's the one collecting.

How is she "collecting", just because he pays child support, doesn't mean she is collecting. What do you want her to do, every time the child needs something call the father and say "hey, (child's name) needs this can you come up here to the store and pay half of it?" Or "hey, your half of child care for the month is 300, can you run to the CDC and pay it." Or "(child's name)'s food for this week is going to cost this much can you meet me at the commissary and pay for half."

That is why child support is a set amount monthly based on how much EACH parent makes. Most of the time child support is not enough to cover half of everything the child needs in a month.

Example: My sister has 3 kids with her ex husband, his "child support" is $73 a week, NOT each but for all 3 together. Please tell me where you are going to be able to get half of everything 3 children need for $292 a month. That doesn't even pay for half of the child care so she can work. 

Justsayin:

BahahahhahahahahahahahHahhH.

I don't need his money. In fact, I've asked him multiple times, he can stop paying and just give me custody. He screwed himself with the court system. If he wants to stop paying by all means I'd be happy he do so. I'd rather him give up custody then have my son wonder where the hell his "FATHER" is on a weekly basis. I do not want my son to hurt. I care about my child's mental well being rather than MONEY HONEY.

That's what being a good mom is. I don't need to defend myself to people who don't even know what the hell they are talking about. You are just an outsider looking in without no knowledge other than what I've mentioned along with your assumptions. Keep going, it gives me the giggles. 

And here comes my shadow again following my posts :)

Also, We aren't talking about anyone's situation but Pulga's.

LDG pointed out it was the sole responsibility of the MALE to pay for the child, forgetting that it takes two people to make a kid thus both parents responsibility for the child . My point was that people like her, having the "problems" they do with their baby daddy would be easily remedied if they got rid of the father, but they are keeping the father's rights for the $. She remarried someone in the military which equals a place to live, benefits and pay (unless the new husband doesn't care enough to want to care for the child). A few people on here have mentioned taking the rights away knowing full well they won't get money for the kid.

No matter what way you look at it SHE is making the financial gain, be it by default or intent, by keeping the father's rights. And she's whooping it up all bc he is using the child for "personal gain". She is making his non-parenting seem like a "burden"..but she won't walk away.


Also, when a baby mama gets remarried/ married they don't calculate the income of the new spouse so her order is based off of what the Marine ex makes and what she needs for the child, but when the ex paying support gets remarried his new spouse income is included , regardless that that person has zero responsibility to the kid. 

You are just an outsider looking in without no knowledge other than what I've mentioned along with your assumptions. Keep going, it gives me the giggles. 

You are just as much of a half-wit when you don't know what people on this site have been through/going through hahaha. 

Oh, I don't spend all of my worldly time and energy on here. You might wanna try that yourself. :) 

;) gotcha, but check my posting history on here and get your answer. Five posts in the past 12 hours is pretty indicative of having a life outside of here. 

Just sayin:

I love how you believe every woman is challenged for finances just because they married a marine. It makes me giggle. You really need to go out and see the sun sometime soon. 

Just sayin:

Honey, I don't need to stalk you. I'd probably catch that negative energy you have. No thanks! LOL 

Thought you didn't spend your whole time on here? Read my post thoroughly. Did I say you were financially challenged? I think Vod was the one who painted you that way and I countered with you having everything being married to another Marine. Tag chasers ain't got nothing on you. 

Tag chasers ain't got nothing on you

Oooooh when you get offended you name call. Cute. What else? Oh yeah! I'm so gold digging!! Mmmmmm yeah I LOVE MONEY! Ooooooh FREE CRAPPY MEDICAL. YAY! LET ME POP ANOTHER KID OUT SO I CAN GET MORE MONEY!!! OMG. Gotta try and get knocked up!!!

Oooopsie! Gotta go shopping!! Let me like totally go buy another Coach purse at like to px and spend hubbies money cause I LIKE TOTALLY don't make enough on my salary!! OMG! Gotta use a coupon too! Let me go to the mall and buy some shizz and ask for a military discount so I can feed off my hubby!!! OH YEAH!!! mmmmmmmm feels good!!! LOL

All you give me is joy, joy at the fact that you are getting so heated off this topic. When the TOPIC was never about money... Hmmmm.... I wonder who is more concerned about it. 

Vod was the one who painted you that way

I did not, YOU said that it takes 2 people to make a kid then why does only ONE person have to be responsible for it? Looks like a 50/50 venture to me, but she's the one collecting.

What I was asking YOU was if it is 50/50, every time the child needs something should she call the father and ask him for half of it right then and there? That would be the "fair" 50/50 way.